What Recurring Trauma & Burnout Did to My Hormones in 2025 - And How I'm Fixing it Now | E283

Have you ever hit a season so hard that you genuinely forgot what feeling okay even feels like?

That's been my last two  years, and today I'm finally sitting down to tell you the real version. Not the polished, wrapped-up-with-a-bow version. The actual one. The version where my nervous system was on fire for a full year straight, where sleep became a stranger, and where even a four-year-old doing normal kid things felt dangerous. 

My son has had some incredibly scary, recurring health events and nothing can really prepare you for what life is like when you're always on high alert in this way. 

Here's the part that still humbles me. I'm a nurse. I coach women on hormones and nervous system regulation for a living. This is literally what I teach. And I still watched my own cortisol shoot through the roof, my sleep completely fall apart, and PMS symptoms show back up that I hadn't dealt with in years. So, if you've ever felt like you know all the "right" things and your body is still falling apart anyway, I want you to know I get it, deeply.

Here's what I'm walking you through in this episode:

• What actually happened with my son that turned our world upside down, including the moment in an airport that I'll never forget
• The specific hormone and cortisol shifts that happen when your body thinks there's an emergency every single second, and why "just relax" is the least helpful advice anyone can give you
• The one belief that kept me moving forward even on the days I had absolutely nothing left to give
• What I did consistently well during the hardest year of my life, and what completely fell apart (hint, it's simpler than you'd think)
• Why my symptoms came back even though I know all the protocols, and what that taught me about the limits of supplements and testing
• What replenishing actually looks like now, and why I'm choosing to do it slowly on purpose

This episode isn't here for sympathy. It's here because I know so many of you are in your own survival season right now, whether that's a sick child, a hard marriage season, a business falling apart, or just life piling on faster than you can process it.

And I want you to know what's actually happening in your body when that happens, because knowing it changed everything for me.

Here's what nobody talks about enough. You can have every credential, every resource, a husband who's also a nurse, a mom who shows up to sit with you when you're too scared to be alone, and a whole community rallying around you, and there still comes a point where none of that is enough to fix what's happening.

That was one of the most disorienting parts of this whole season for me, realizing that all my knowledge and all my support could not fix what was happening to my son. I had to learn how to hold onto faith AND expertise at the same time, without either one canceling the other out.

For a full year, I don't think I felt safe for one single stretch of time. Even when I tried to take a nap or step into another room by myself, part of me was still listening, still waiting for the next thing to go wrong. And if you've ever lived in that kind of alert mode, even for a few weeks, you already know what it does to the body. Your minerals get depleted fast. Sleep becomes nearly impossible even when you're exhausted. Your gut and your hormones stop getting the message that it's safe to function normally, because as far as your nervous system is concerned, there's an emergency happening at all times.

I watched this play out in my own body in real time, which was humbling in a very specific way, because I've built my whole career around helping other women avoid exactly this. PMS symptoms I hadn't dealt with in years came right back. My sleep, which used to be one of my strong points (I used to brag about being a great sleeper, if you can believe that), fell apart completely. There's something so vulnerable about watching your body do the exact thing you coach other people out of.

I'm walking you through what I did right during the hardest stretch (eating real food and staying connected to people mattered more than I realized) and what slipped, because sleep and consistent eating were the first things to go when survival mode took over. I think you'll recognize a lot of yourself in both lists.

And now that we're finally coming out the other side, I'm sharing exactly what replenishing looks like for me these days. It's not a fancy supplement stack or some rigid new protocol. It's prioritizing sleep even when part of me still wants to stay up late just to enjoy the quiet. It's speaking life over myself even on days I don't fully believe it yet. It's rebuilding my mineral levels through food first. And it's actively choosing joy again instead of just waiting for it to eventually show back up on its own.

If your body has been holding onto stress you haven't fully named yet, or if you're deep in a season where survival is genuinely the goal and healing feels far off, I made this one for you. Hit play on your next school run, your grocery run, or whatever it is you're doing today, because I think you needed to hear this.

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Disclaimer: Nothing in this podcast is to be taken as medical advice, please take informed accountability and speak to your provider before making changes to your health routine.

This podcast is for women and moms to learn how to balance hormones naturally in motherhood, to have pain-free periods, increased fertility, to decrease PMS mood swings, and to increase energy without restrictive diet plans. You'll learn how to balance blood sugar, increase progesterone naturally, understand the root cause of estrogen dominance, irregular periods, PCOS, insulin resistance, hormonal acne, post birth-control syndrome, and conceive naturally. We use a pro-metabolic, whole food, root cause approach to functional women's health and focus on truly holistic health and mind-body connection.

If you listen to any of the following shows, we're sure you'll like ours too! 
Pursuit of Wellness with Mari Llewellyn, Culture Apothecary with Alex Clark, Found My Fitness with Rhonda Patrick, Just Ingredients Podcast, Wellness Mama, The Dr Josh Axe Show, Are You Menstrual Podcast, The Model Health Show, Grounded Wellness By Primally Pure, Be Well By Kelly Leveque, The Freely Rooted Podcast with Kori Meloy, Simple Farmhouse Life with Lisa Bass

Transcript

E283_ Behind the Hard Season_ Rebuilding Self

[00:00:00] Today I am finally diving into the behind-the-scenes of what the last couple years have looked like for me, and they truly have been some of the hardest years of my life. We are gonna talk about what happens in your body when you have sustained stress and sustained trauma, and what happens to your progesterone, your cortisol, your minerals, your gut, all of those things when your body is under extreme sustained stress.

Not even just the daily stress that we talk about all the time, but the kind of stress that you didn't choose, and it's very hard to optimize your way out of. So this is a deep dive into not only chronic stress, but acute stress, how I have done my best to sustain in the midst of a survival season, and what I'm doing now to replenish as we're finally doing better So I'm gonna be really honest, and I have had moments where I thought that I was gonna record this [00:01:00] episode over the last few months, and really have just not felt ready.

And I'm not sure if I'm ever gonna be ready really, but there is so much growth and so much goodness that has happened because of the circumstances that we've been in, that I want to really share this story through that lens. And even as I've thought about recording this episode, I want to be so careful because this is not an episode to share hard things and have pity I feel like in our society it's so easy to try to play the victim.

And that's absolutely not the point of this episode at all. It truly is to be real with you. When you listen to me talk about hormones, and you listen to me talk about creating safety in your body, like this is so real for me, too, and I'm not always doing it perfectly. I am so thankful that I've spent the last couple of years talking all the time, [00:02:00] daily, weekly with not only you guys listening to the podcast, but also with my clients and also with my friends about these topics.

And they've only become more important and more real to me as I have needed to be so intentional about creating safety wherever I can when nothing has felt safe. And so this is really just to not only show you that sustained feelings of not being safe absolutely can cause detriment, but also that even when you can't do very much for yourself or you're not even in the capacity to try to do very much for yourself, that what you do still matters to such an extent.

The story that I'm telling today started back about four years ago, almost exactly four years ago, when my third child, my little sweet boy,

Was only nine months old, and he had a really severe febrile seizure, and it came [00:03:00] completely out of the blue for us. I had had a few health things with my other kiddos. My daughter had a little bit of asthma. My other son actually had meningitis when he was a tiny baby, which is also crazy. We have no idea why.

He literally was at home the whole time. , so we've had some things with our kiddos' health, but they were short-lived, and they were fairly easily resolved, and we saw God's hand of healing in those things. And seizures are something that you just never... Especially, like, they're not in our family. This isn't something expected.

, But if you would've asked me before that happens, if I had a fear of my child having a seizure, it wasn't even on my list. It wasn't even on my radar. , There would've been 1,400 other things that I would've put in front of that because it just was never something that I had had experience with.

But, , over those next couple of years, he not only had that one, but he had several seizures a [00:04:00] year along with an illness. And to say that that turned my world upside down, I think is really true because not only was I, of course, deep diving into the functional health side of things, we did so much deep diving that we found mold in our house, and we moved to a rental house, and then we bought another house that we thought was our dream house on five acres.

And to be clear, the house itself was never my dream, but I loved the five acres, and we're fix-it people, so we were like, "We'll totally be able to do this." And we did mold testing in that house before we moved in because we didn't want to have mold, and we thought that it was maybe contributing to the seizures.

And so, , we're working on, you know, functional health protocols and, , just very like this is gonna be short-lived. Moved into that house, long story short, had a year and a half of fighting mold in that house. It was way worse than we thought it was, and even when we got to the point where we [00:05:00] had fixed everything we knew to fix, there was just something in me that did not feel like we could be healthy there, that we could be safe there.

I had some crazy symptoms in that house. I had migraines with auras that I had never had before. I had dizziness. I had heart palpitations. I had all these things that did not make sense in context of the life that I live, and thankfully all of that was pretty short-lived for me and resolved as we got rid of the mold and as we moved out of that house.

But it was, it was a lot, and when we were going through all of this, We were always looking for the root cause. We were always looking for the reason, and I, I really even at that point was just like, "Oh, okay, , if I just find the thing, then we're gonna be able to fix it on our own." And so even in that place, I've always had faith, and I've always prayed, but it was kind of like, , "Lord, just show us what to do.

We'll do it." It was still very much from a place of, , I can handle this. , I can control this. I can figure it out. , I need you a little [00:06:00] bit, God, but, , probably I'm mostly okay on my own. And, , I wouldn't have said that, but there was a very real part of me that, like, that's what I believed.

And looking back, I just looked back at a couple of my prayer journals from a few years ago, and, , some of the things that I asked for, I'm like, "Wow, God really delivered on those prayers." And he did it in a way that I would not have been brave enough to choose, but, , my heart has truly changed through this process.

And so we eventually moved out of that house, moved into a brand new house., Made sure it was clear of mold, and it was kind of like, okay, , here we are. We've arrived. We're in our new chapter. , My son's gonna be getting so much better. , We were at a point where he seemed like he was doing pretty great.

, And it just felt , okay,, we've arrived. Things are good. And we decided to go on a trip, and we were on our way to Florida. We had a layover in Denver, [00:07:00] which is not on the way to Florida, by the way, for us. But we had a layover in Denver, and my son had a seizure in the airport in Denver.

And so this was not expected, clearly. , Praise God, we had already gotten on the plane, and they kept, , going through and counting people multiple times and, , couldn't seem to figure out, , the right amount of people on the plane. And so the door was still open when it happened, and we were able to run off the plane, get medical care, , in the terminal, and then ended up going to the hospital with him there because it was different than it had been before.

And the seizures that he has had really have never been minor. They have been super long. They have been super, super scary, often life-threatening. Just seeing the way that the Lord has, , had his hand in these situations so many times, where He has... Like, we weren't in the air. We should've been in the air an hour and a half before the seizure happened.

And even just my husband and I both being nurses, we both have emergency [00:08:00] training. We know what to do in a true emergency, and that has been extremely valuable. And even just having a husband who also, , has that training and can be a professional in this situation that we've had to be able to support our son until we can get help or until the seizure is over.

When I say these are not minor, , I'm not gonna go into all the details, but, , truly not minor, truly so scary so much of the time. And, , this happened in the airport, and we went to the hospital, found out he had the flu, and he ended up having three seizures that week, and we were stuck in Denver and never made it to the beach.

So that was somewhat devastating in and of itself because I'm such a beach person. It's January. , All I want is sunshine. , But it really, truly felt... In that moment, I told my husband, , we're in the hospital instead of almost to Florida like we were supposed to be, and I was like, "This feels like a personal spiritual attack."

Whether or not that was completely true, [00:09:00] I don't know, but , this is my baby. This is scary. We're not going to the beach. , We are stuck in the cold. , All of these things, , it just felt so wrong. And I have this deep, deep belief that health is , it's right for us to be healthy.

It's right for us to have bodies that are functioning well, and we live in this world that it opposes health in a lot of different ways at this point in our modern world

But I still believe that there's, there's so much that we can do to support health. And so this goes against everything in my core that I'm like, "This has to stop," right? And over the next... This is January of 2025, and over the next full year, it only got worse. The seizures started happening without a fever.

They started happening more often. They started being more severe. , And they were happening anywhere from every week to every two weeks, and really coming out of the blue. There were a couple triggers that we could identify, but a lot that we couldn't identify. And [00:10:00] so we did intense functional treatments.

We went to a functional neurology center. We did a ton of testing. We did a ton of, protocols, all kinds of things

 And we ended up starting medication as well, which was not on my list of things I ever thought I would do for my four-year-old. But we got to the point where it was terribly heavy it was these heavy rescue meds and, , a ton of medication at the hospital or daily medication. We were doing really everything to help him, , that we could think of.

And throughout 2025, we just were not seeing progress. We were trying so many different things and just not seeing the progress that we wanted to see. And we got to a place where we were just desperate, honestly, and it honestly didn't take me very long to get there, and I was there for a long time, [00:11:00] and realized how even when, honestly, you have all the right credentials and, , you think you should be able to figure things out or at least find the right people to figure things out, and you have resources, and you have, , family who is willing to support you, and a great community who's willing to support you, sometimes there's just not enough that anyone can do in these situations.

And so I truly cannot imagine going through such a hard thing with less support than I have, and just the way that I've seen friends and family step up and just help us so much. And there were even times where, , I was truly uncomfortable being at home with him by myself, and my mom would come over and stay with me while my husband worked, and things like that.

So when I say, , we were in a survival season, , it is crazy to change your perspective so drastically that anything that is a normal thing [00:12:00] for a four-year-old to do feels dangerous. Running, going outside, jumping, laughing too hard. It's really wild to see , how many things could feel dangerous because of circumstances that we had experienced.

When we were In this, for truly a full year, like the height of it was a full, full year, , I never felt safe. There was no break. Even if I tried to take a break and go take a nap or go somewhere by myself, nothing ever felt safe. It always felt like there was just one, mom shout away or one, you know, anything, phone call, just one second away from something scary happening and needing to respond and needing to know right away that something was happening.

And so this level... i'm not sharing, again, any of this to create a victim mentality or, , even to get sympathy, [00:13:00] but just to illustrate, this is where I was in my body even coming to a place of, taking all of this to the Lord so consistently and seeing Him again and again provide the help that we needed in these emergencies.

But there was so much of me that just questioned, like, "Why is this happening in the first place?" Everything in me questioning why is this happening in the first place? This is my baby

The level of this in my body where nothing ever felt safe, this affects obviously your nervous system, but this is depleting minerals at a rapid pace. This is not creating an environment for good sleep. This is your brain never telling your body that it's safe to make and detox hormones well.

Because if you are truly feeling that there's an emergency every second or that there could be an emergency every second, then your body is not going to calm down easily. Even though I have so many tools and I had so many tools to [00:14:00] support myself through it, there is depletion on the other side of this.

And I saw some symptoms start to come back that were resolved for a long time during this, like having some PMS mood swings again, so ironic. Constance, that's what I talk about all the time. , Noticing that towards the end of this year, I wasn't sleeping as well as I used to sleep. I've always been a great sleeper, but I would wake up in the middle of the night and not be able to go back to sleep, having breast tenderness or having fatigue that I hadn't had, if not ever, like definitely in a very long time since I started taking care of my body in a different way.

And so not only is that very humbling when you talk about it yourself all the time, but it also, there is a, there can be just a crisis of identity essentially when you are a health practitioner, you're also a nurse, , all of the education you have is in health, and you also believe in a God who can heal immediately or through modern measures or through functional measures or in any way He decides to heal.

Seeking that healing [00:15:00] so intently for not only my son, but also myself, and living in this survival mode is

hard on the nervous system in and of itself. And so knowing the foundations that I know, there was never a time where I just said, " I give up, and I'm not gonna take care of myself anymore." But there's definitely a time where it does not feel like there's space to slow down and breathe. There's definitely times where getting enough sleep is really hard because if you...

There are times where I was truly, , following him around all day long to make sure he didn't fall and hit his head. And when you have a four-year-old that you're following around like a toddler who's just learning to walk, they have a different, , cognitive ability, right? A four-year-old has, praise God, his brain has been so strong and healthy through all of this and his mental capacity, but, , four-year-olds wanna do crazy stuff, and one-year-olds also do, but their bodies can't quite do it.

And so just [00:16:00] even the amount of time that it took to keep a good eye on him and not,, skip his protocols and make sure he was napping appropriately and all of these things, , it's hard to do anything else. Then, , also feeding my family and also making sure the house doesn't burn down and also running a business.

, All of these things, , self-care can go by the wayside no matter how much you believe in it. Just to kind of clarify, , my nervous system was obviously super hyped up. My cortisol levels when I took a Dutch test in the middle of that year were crazy high. I just started laughing when I saw them 'cause I was like, "Yep, that's about right.

, They're off the charts, and I feel like that." And even though my hormones really, praise God, have not taken that big of a hit, some minor symptoms and really not a lot else, there is a clear pattern of depletion when your body is on high alert for a long time. To make sure this story doesn't get too, too long, , after January to February of this year continued to be really hard and was [00:17:00] honestly kind of the hardest place that we got to, and then he started doing better, and he has been doing better for the last four months, and we are so thankful.

I really believe that, , God has healed him through multiple different measures that we have taken. , But, , God's hand has been in all of this, Regardless of, , what we are or aren't doing in the physical, truly, , He has allowed for him to start healing, and so we are so thankful for that.

And there is still a level of being on alert that will take a long time to go away. There are still a lot of things that regular almost five-year-olds do that I'm not sure if I'm okay with him doing. And it is so much better than it was at the height of things that my body is starting to come down off of these stress hormones.

In this season, the last couple of months, I've been really focused on intentionally replenishing and taking back what has been stolen because joy has been stolen, safety has been stolen, [00:18:00] peace in my home has been stolen, productivity, so many different things. But choosing that I am intentionally going back towards these things is so important because not only do I still have three children to take care of, but I missed having fun.

I miss things feeling safe, and so I am moving towards that at the pace that I feel safe to do it. But not only just... I'm gonna talk about what I'm doing physically, but not only just what I'm doing physically, truly working towards joy and safety and peace in my emotions is incredibly important to me in this season because I need to replenish and feel safe to be able to continue walking forward with a healthy body.

Because if I let these patterns continue or if I stay in a victim mindset or a stress, , survival mindset for any longer than absolutely necessary, I know that it will only continue to cause more symptoms and sickness long term 

[00:00:00] So let's talk about what I have done well and not well to maintain and take care of my body in the midst of this stress and what I'm doing now as we are finally in less of a survival season. I'm gonna start with what I have actually been consistent with, I have been very consistent with eating real food the whole time.

We never got to a point where we were eating out a ton or eating a lot of convenience food. We stayed with our plans of eating real food, and even though that does take work, it was work that I could do While I was taking care of my son. And so eating real food, staying consistent with that, , staying consistent with exercise pretty much throughout for most of the time, whether or not it looked as good as I wanted it to look.

And for the most part, doing really well keeping blood sugar balanced, keeping my meals balanced, and things like that. I [00:01:00] also in a lot of ways feel like I was able to stay pretty connected to friends and family. Like I mentioned, we had a lot of support, and that is so incredibly important. Now, where I did not do as well as I would like to do in the future is sometimes consistency with eating enough was really hard, and that is just typically how my body responds to stress, but it's not a surprising pattern because when cortisol rises, as I've talked about, your gut is suppressed, and so your appetite can be suppressed, your stomach acid can be suppressed, your digestion can be suppressed.

And so eating enough sometimes was hard to do, and sometimes eating enough right away in the morning was hard to do, which is something that, you know, I value at a high level and I really believe is important, and sometimes it was still really hard to do. And so I often would do something like just my Equip protein and milk and still get a high nutrient density, [00:02:00] high protein something first thing in the morning to try to tell myself that things were safe in some circumstances, and that usually worked really well for me.

I also found that really going outside sometimes, getting enough sunlight was hard because the heat seemed to be a trigger, , for a lot of the time where I, even last summer, I feel like I didn't get the sunshine that I would love to get. And so that's been a redemption moment this summer is finding ways to be able to do that.

I also will say I think the thing that has suffered most in all of this has been my sleep. Even just the constant feeling like things were not safe all day long really led to once he finally was in bed and I finally felt like, "Okay, today's okay, and everything's all right, and nothing bad happened," then I would have a such a hard time going to bed, I'm sure because my cortisol was not in a great place, my melatonin was suppressed, but also because it just finally felt peaceful.

I know this is something that all [00:03:00] moms can pretty much resonate with is finally when the kids are in bed. But this was a whole other level of it for me, not just like, "Oh, it's nice," but all of a sudden my nervous system no longer feels on fire, and I finally feel safe, and I know that today is okay, and it's bedtime.

And so I definitely have changed- I've been working to change my patterns back to going to bed earlier, but that's a habit that just staying up later and not getting enough sleep has been a struggle. And so that is something that I just wanna share, you know, not only , oh, this is how I've, you know, kept everyone alive, but, like, .

there are things that slipped off my radar because it's hard to keep up with., And I think that just realizing that, , everything is a season, and you can, you can change these things, , little by little. , But I would say sleep is really the biggest one that I think has affected me. My energy has stayed really good for a long time, but I've noticed that as I'm finally now coming down off of some of these stress hormones, my energy has not been as great.

, And that's a new thing for me. And so [00:04:00] that is something that I'm really paying attention to and working on replenishing, not only with sleep, but also with minerals and also, , by just filling my cup. As we are now, praise God, walking in a season that feels lighter, and I'm seeing Him redeem so many things that I feel like were stolen in this last couple of years, I am really focusing on sleep.

That's one of the biggest ones. And I'm doing it very imperfectly because I still have this tendency of wanting to stay up later at night and just enjoying that time, and so I'm really trying to find the balance of that. I'm doing a little bit of testing on myself to... I'm redoing a Dutch test this cycle to see what is happening with my cortisol, with my hormones, and I am interested to see.

Where my cortisol is, how my hormones have sustained through this. Even last year when my cortisol was really high, my hormones were still looking good, still making [00:05:00] enough progesterone. And so even though my symptoms have really stayed pretty mild, I wanna check in with that so that I can continue to support my body as well as possible.

I probably will do some gut testing in the future, even though I don't have really gut symptoms, because I know, and I've shared with you already on this podcast, how much cortisol has an impact on the gut, and digestion, and inflammation. And when we know that nutrient deficiencies, overload of toxins, and lack of sleep, and stress are huge triggers for oxidative stress in the body, and for the body to not feel safe to do any of the things that make you healthy, like make hormones well, detox hormones well, , create new cells, all of these things are suppressed when you're under chronic stress.

And so I am so thankful for the opportunity now to work on replenishing my body, really replenishing minerals, really , replenishing through sleep, but also resetting my nervous system [00:06:00] by speaking life over myself. , I've been doing this almost the whole time, and I really believe it has been so powerful in all of our healing.

, But speaking life, being so careful of the things that I say over myself and over my children, and spending time in praise and in prayer, because even though that's not a protocol that we can follow, it absolutely changes our beliefs, and our beliefs change our health.

 As much as I believe in testing and protocols and getting to the root cause in that sense, I also know for me that none of that is going to stick if I stay on high alert and I stay looking for problems all the time and my nervous system never has a chance to slow down. Because at the core of my health beliefs is this belief you've heard me say a jillion times, that our bodies have to feel safe to heal well.

[00:07:00] And so I am not prioritizing supplements or testing or anything fancy above creating safety through sleep, through blood sugar balance, through really focusing on nutrients, really upping my micronutrients coming in and not just checking my boxes with macronutrients, but really looking at how can I replenish magnesium and potassium and zinc and copper and iron through food and not just through supplements.

Do I also need some supplements at this point? Probably, and yes, I am taking some. But if I think I can out-supplement the amount of stress that I've been under, I can test and supplement and that's gonna fix the problem, it's not true. And so I'm really trying to see the bigger picture for myself, which as, honestly, as good as I am at seeing that for other people, it is harder to see for myself and it is easy to say, "Oh, maybe I should just take some supplements," right?

Or do what feels like the easy thing. And so I am really trying to not only practice what I [00:08:00] preach in the, , most basic sense of that, but in the big picture sense, too. And this is really where it can circle back around and we can apply this to any woman who wants to improve their health and not only prevent symptoms now, but prevent chronic illness long term.

We've all had stress in different ways. We've all had things that have depleted us, and so really stopping to see the big picture or have someone help you see the big picture is huge. And this is what we do in coaching. This is what we do when we not only do lab work and the root cause, like, health work, but we also get to the root cause of the emotions.

We also look at your whole lifestyle and see how you are being drained more. More energy is going out than coming in, so that we can stop that flow so we can start to infuse joy. We can start to support the nervous system. We can start to feel safe so that the things we're doing actually [00:09:00] work with nutrients and with supplements and all of those things.

So thank you friends for listening to this today. I really love to stay with the science. I love to stay with helping other people and telling you what you can do to take care of yourself, because isn't that more comfy for all of us? But I just felt like it was time to be really open myself, and so I appreciate you listening, and I will see you next week